Un-Staging

Everybody knows about staging. Okay, so maybe a few of you good folks do not, so by way of quick explanation, "Staging" is a concept wherein a seller prepares the home for sale by doing cockamamie things that the "home stagers" tell you will sell your home FASTFASTFAST.

Now, folks, you and I know that so nobody is fooled by some bric-a-brac bought at the local Homegoods store, or candles burning in the alcove. We ALL know that in order to sell a home FASTFASTFAST, you have to price it RIGHTRIGHTRIGHT.

I have never been one for staging. It all looks so phony to me. I walk into a "staged" home and I think of Ikea; I smell the scented candles and I want to sneeze at best (at worst, I want to look behind the fridge for the mildew).

No folks, I do not like staging, but that does not mean I am in favor of UN-STAGING...

UN-Staging is a concept I developed. I tell my clients that we must make sure not to unstage and they ask, "What, perchance is that?"

Un-staging is what I call the act of NOT doing those things that will turn off a buyer or, at best, mitigate against a favorable offer. Herewith is a list of UN-Staging items -- things we should not do:

Do not leave the foreclosure notice on the dining room table -- No one is going to up their offer for your home if they know you are in hock up to your hams. Likewise the overdue bills.

Do not show off your pets -- Fido suffers from "bad breath in dog's mouth", sorry to tell you that (you smell just like him after all these years of letting him sit in your lap). No one thinks your dog is cute. As soon as I see a free range dog, I begin to wonder where is the wee-wee stain from those paper training days.

Cats -- forget it, lock 'em up. Every five minutes they are hurling a hair ball; the litter box stinks and the food on the floor is gross.

Hubby -- if the man of the house uses male enhancement, for goodness sakes, hide the bottle; do not leave it on the dresser. We ALL know what goes on in the bedroom, and we may even go to a movie and watch Sasha Gray do it in mind boggling concatenations of styling, but we DO NOT want to think about YOU doing it. While you are at it,...change the bedsheets.

We have all been told that cooking makes a buyer feel all warm and fuzzy, but DO NOT leave the stew on the stove during a showing. The whole recipe is going to boil down to a tarry mass while you are gone and the house will stink like burnt rubber.

I love fireplaces, but do NOT leave 'em going when I show up with a prospective buyer. The only message that can come of this is, "What kind of a moron lives here who would light a fireplace and leave?"

Do not put the dirty diapers into the diaper bin -- they still stink! You just can't smell it anymore. Put the whole bin outside. While you are at it, take down some of Junior's picture. Too many pictures makes the house look too well lived in.

Don't use the basement for storage! If "ya got" clutter, rent a place. Boxes piled high just look like you are hiding something.

Hide the magazine collections. We are all very impressed knowing you read the New Yorker...this week's issue is just fine, but we DON'T need to see them going back to 1965.

Don't leave 3 weeks of leftovers in the fridge. It smells, and at any rate, the fridge may well be part of the offer. Even if it is not, the buyers are going to open it.

Do you really need to leave that box of Trojan's in the medicine cabinet? Do you really need to leave the "Girls Gone Wild" DVDs on the night rest? If you do, at least leave a copy of Citizen Kane there.

DO NOT vacuum TOMORROW! Do it today.

Do not soak the dishes.

Do NOT smoke...EVER. In fact, stop smoking TEN YEARS before you decide to sell. That is how long the nicotine is going to take to dry out of your wall board.

Don't leave fancy chocolates around...good ol' Hershey works just fine. I mean, it might not have an impact on selling the home but, well, what I mean is...I like Hershey...

A Friend in Need Should NOT Be a Friend (IN)Deed

She comes to me and says, "We were together for 5 years. It seemed only natural."

My friend here (ALL my friends are women), was showing me shapshots of the renovated kitchen in the condo she bought "yonder" about 8 years ago. "I mean," she postured, "We did so much work on the place, together, and he seemed to be the perfect guy!"

Now, folks, those of you who know me, can well attest that I work magic on women -- I make 'em disappear! I bring this up to point out that IF I knew what was the perfect man, I would have fashioned myself to be one long ago....So I asked her, "Perfect? How so."

"Well, single, never married, no kids, fortyish, living with his mother..." I lose it there...Any woman who thinks a forty-year-old living with is mother is perfect, well...'nuf said on that!

"So," she continues, "it was only natural. It seemed so normal to do it....And then I find out -- he's been in so many affairs that he should be a caterer! And he comes to me and tells me he's got some girl pregnant and, get this...he wonders if maybe it might be best if WE raise the child as OUR own!" And off she goes to Sobbingland.

"Well throw Old Lochinvar out, for crissake," I say.

"But I can't."

"Listen, honey," I move in for the heart-to-heart, "this is no time to play the conscience, the guy's a bum with a wet wick..."

"No it is not that," she cries, "we were an 'US'; a together, a 'WE'...so last year, I put his name on the deed. I can't throw him out; he owns the place too!" (And now even I'M crying!) "Yes, last year, while he was shakin' and bakin' in Miss GirlScoutCookie's oven, I was off at the lawyer changing the ownership of this place from a 'ME' to a 'WE'. On our 'quote' anniversary, 'unquote', I showed it to him. So Ya see, I can't throw him out, no more than he can throw me out! And he can bring his damn cupcake in with him, I suppose and we can all do a 3-some, or maybe THEY do a 2-some while I burp the baby." And inconsolable tears aplenty pour forth.

Readers, when words fail me (and they DO NOT FAIL very often), I think of cleavage, and here, words failed me... For a few short moments, I thought about how my friend would look in a shred of lingerie from the Frederick's of Hollywood collection (this situation was WELL beyond Victoria's Secret stuttering!).

"Uhhh, yeah," I say, my "unShakesperean moment continuing, "Uhh ya," and I say the only thing I can say, "Call your attorney."

Who knows, maybe it all can be undone. Maybe there is something in deceitful intent...but one thing is for certain -- don't make a friend, indeed, a friend IN DEED.

Value Added Investment Grade? One step at a Time

Agents live for broker tours. For those not of the "cognoscenti", a broker tour is like an Open House, except it is an Open House for the "elect" -- read that for only brokers. It is a chance for a listing agent to show a property to other agents in the hope they may well have a client who would like the home. Agents going on tour do not necessarily like the Broker Tours for this -- they like it for the free food that is usually spread out by the Listing Agent to entice the traffic. For example, in my corner of the world, "lunch" is served in Belmont, Arlington and Cambridge on Tuesdays, Wednesday it is Newton, and Friday it is Watertown and Waltham (yum yum). Other towns in my area have their days...check an agent's GPS history and you can figure that out for Medford, Lexington, Wellesley, Brookline and so on.

The other day, I go to this broker tour. I am cheerfully met at the door by a sprightly young agent (I know she is young...the low cut sweater [a Cashmere Over Sized Cowl Tunic from Michael Star; $326] that she wears is slightly amiss at the left shoulder exposing not just a maroon bra strap [Victoria's Secret], but also the wing of an angel tattoo pricked into the skin, I surmise, after a long night with some Brown University frat boy(s?) -- I recognize the work...Ronnie's Tattoo, Providence, RI; $89.99).

"Welcome," she says, and, "Oh, could you please remove your shoes?"

Now readers, at my stage in life and in this place and time, I should be excited when a woman asks me to remove ANY article of my clothing, in this case, if for nothing else, for the one second of fantasy that this person has a foot fetish. Alas, sadly, she spoke too fast and cut all "fantasm" to the quick.

"It is the rugs," she imparts, "they are collector quality."

For the first time, I looked below the agent's torso, passed the Eileen Fisher Stretch Ponte Pencil Skirt (Sak's Fifth Avenue, $158), down the finely waxed calves (Li Kim Thuy's Nail and Wax Shop [bikini lines a specialty], Dorchester, perhaps?) and down to the bare feet ("Shoeless" Joe Jackson; Chicago White Sox, 1919). Off to the right was an imitation brass scupper (Home and Hearth, $68), and neatly resting in it were the agent's shoes; black high heeled "court pumps" from Redoute Creations, Paris (40 Euros or 60 bucks at current exchange rates).

"You see," she continued, "the rugs are all quite pricey. This one is an Isfahan and over there in the sitting room is a Bakhshaish. This runner is a Hussainaba. They are investments!"

Now folks, I really do not want to talk rugs here, but rugs as an investment?...I mean if you want people to just stamp and stomp all over your investments, that is O.K, but why not just give your money to Wall Street? That's what they down there everyday.

"Uh, huh," I say as I remove my shoes (PayLess $14.99 Buy-One-Get-One-Free [BOGO]), thanking God for the wisdom of that trip to Marshall's the day before (New black socks, slightly irregular, 6 pair; $3.99). As I am doing this, I am searching about for the route to the kitchen and the free lunch platter laid out. After all, all I want, all ALL agents want is a sandwich and maybe a Coke to go (free at Broker Tours; $1.59 at 7-11; remember to cash in the can and you come out a nickel to the good!).

"And," she points out, "all the collectibles on the walls!", and she directs my attention to the shelves and cut outs and nooks and crannies filled with bric-a-bracs, porcelains and potteries of all manner of invention.

"Listen," I say, still looking beyond her slender posterior for the platter (do I smell roast beef!?), "I don't know, kiddo...you are going to bring a lot of people into this house and with all these nicknacks about, well...I'd be afraid that some of them are going to get 'paddy-whacked'...and you'll be the one that will have to, shall we say, 'give the dog the bone' if you get my drift". She didn't, apparently she is too young for the "This-Old-Man-He-Plays-One" joke motif.

"Come again?" she says, and I reply something to the effect that at my age, I would need a good dose of Viagra to do that (she didn't get that joke either).

"I don't understand," she says.

I tell her, "What I mean is...it's the stuff...no one -- not even you!!! -- will be looking at the house. It is ALL stuff. First you ask folks to take off their shoes...what if they have a hole in their sock?" (Thank God [again] I went to Marshalls!), "then they walk into this museum. Let me tell ya, honey, people want to live in a house, not a museum. You know who lives in a museum?...King Tut lives in a museum, and for him that's an upgrade, 'cause before that he was living in a freaking hole in the desert for 3 thousand years!. Folks want to see if their entertainment center from Jordan's Furniture will fit here. They want to see the glow of the hardwood floors; they don't want to tip-toe around some magic carpet smuggled out of Pakistan. For your sake and for the sake of your client, you need to get this place cleaned up. You're not selling admission tickets here...you are selling a house."

She begins a retort of some sort, but I am gone; I see the snake route to the kitchen and the spread; catered by Rebecca's!!! ooooh!, Turkey, Tuna, Veggie, and ROAST BEEF on SOUR DOUGH ROLLS ($7.99 each), a bag of Cape Cod Chips ($1.19)...and a Diet Coke.........TO GO.

The Belmont and Watertown and Newton and...THIEF

This is right outta the local Belmont (MA) "rag". It is too funny not to copy. Check out the "Perp's" Mode-of-Op...

By Dan Atkinson, Jen Thomas, Christian Schiavone and Emily Costello/belmont@cnc.com
Belmont Citizen-Herald
Posted Mar 31, 2010 @ 05:04 PM
Last update Mar 31, 2010 @ 05:27 PM
Newton, Mass. — Newton police have arrested a suspect in connection with last weekend’s theft of a bronze plaque from the Homer Building in Belmont, as well as a similar theft in Newton.

Vincent Cedrone, 52, of 315 Crafts St. in Newton, was charged with two counts of receiving stolen property, according to Newton Police Lt. Bruce Apotheker. He reportedly stole a bronze plaque from the Chestnut Grove condominium complex at 1175 Chestnut St. as well as the plaque in Belmont, Apotheker said.

Belmont police have also charged Cedrone with larceny over $250 and defacing property in connection with the March 21 theft of the Homer Building plaque, which was captured by several security cameras. The plaque is valued at about $1,900.

Cedrone’s arrest isn’t the first time his name has been connected to a missing historic plaque.

Last January, he received a $1,000 reward for returning the Belfry plaque stolen from Lexington’s Battle Green, according to one of the three businessmen who offered the reward.

Several weeks after the plaque went missing in December 2009, a Lexington police officer reportedly spotted Cedrone trying to load it into his car. He allegedly told the officer he found it and wanted to return it.

Now Cedrone is suspected of similar thefts in Belmont, Newton and Watertown, according to police officials in the three towns.

Lt. Richard Santangelo, a spokesman for the Belmont Police Department, said police received information that led them to Cedrone after releasing the security camera videos to news outlets, including one that aired the footage on the evening news.

The footage shows a man pulling into the Town Hall complex in a small white coupe at 4:30 p.m. The man appears to first try to pull off the bronze plaque on the school department building across the driveway, but gives up and moves on to the Homer Building.

“It was definitely the result getting the pictures out there to people,” said Santangelo. “Right after the broadcast we got some information.”

Santangelo declined to say what type of information police received and said he didn’t know whether it came first to police Belmont or Newton. After a joint investigation between police in Newton and Belmont, Newton officers made the arrest, Santangelo said.

So far, the Homer Building plaque has not been recovered and may have already been sold for scrap, according to police.

Santangelo said Cedrone is also a suspect in the theft of four other plaques from the Waverley Square area. One was mounted on a concrete post on the railroad bridge running along Trapelo Road. The other three were smaller plaques set in stone monuments around the triangular grassy space over the Waverley Square Commuter Rail station.

Historical plaques have turned up stolen in Newton and Watertown in recent months. Tablets have been swiped from Newton's Country Day School, Memorial Monument Rock at Newton City Hall and the Johnny Kelley statue.

Watertown had seven plaques stolen — three from Arsenal Park, three from in front of the Commander's Mansion on Talcott Avenue and one from Watertown Square. All appear to have been pried off.

Lt. Michael Lawn of the Watertown Police Department said police believe the thefts in Watertown, Belmont and Newton are related. Though Cedrone has not been charged with any of the Watertown thefts, Lawn said the police are "confident" the crimes were committed by the same person.

Thieves did not get away with another plaque at the George Washington monument in front of the Watertown Free Public Library, though the plaque suffered some damage from what appears to be an attempt at dislodging it.

Police believe the plaques were stolen so the metal could be scrapped.

Newton's Apotheker would not comment if Cedrone is connected to other plaque thefts, referring questions to the Middlesex District Attorney's office. The DA's office has not returned phone calls for comment.

At least a dozen plaques have been reported stolen in the Newton area over the past few weeks.

Despite Cedrone's arrest, John Carroll, one of the Lexington businessmen who gave Cedrone the reward, said he was just happy to have the plaque back.

“When we made the offer, it was no questions asked,” said Carroll, who owns Stone Meadow Golf on Waltham Street. “We were more interested in getting the plaque back and making sure it wasn't sold for scrap. It turned out well in the end.”

Copyright 2010 Belmont Citizen-Herald. Some rights reserved

Agents are full of S**T -- Redux

Yesterday (see below) I put out some stats on Orders of Notice in my corner of the world, YTD versus last year for the same period. They painted a grim picture "malgre" the rosy smiles of the "housewife home hucksters" who daily run about hawking homes whilst "habidashing" about the kitchen curtains.

I was asked by many for some support of the numbers as they were from "only a small sample" of towns.

Herewith, I pick Suffolk County -- That is BOSTON, REVERE, CHELSEA, WINTHROP. Here goes...

1/1/10 to 3/18/10 560 Orders of Notice.
1/1/09 to 3/18/09 194 Orders of Notice.

As far as Middlesex South goes...

1/1/10 to 3/18/10 745 Orders of Notice
1/1/09 to 3/18/09 202 Orders of Notice

'nuf said?

"Ducking" the Weather

There are ducks swimming in my backyard...not in the little pond at the northwest corner, but in the yard where, at about this time every year, I begin the annual toil of planting happy grass and expunging, well, crab grass. Not today.

It appears the water table has risen above the banks of the pond, and the pond has made ownership of a substantial swath of the yard. I noticed a fish in a place that would normally make it a "fish out of water". I had hoped the little adventurer wold submarine itself back to the deeper climes of the pond, but sadly, that did not happen;...an aquatic squirrel tip-toed through the shallows and made a "canape" of the "carp."

Many open houses on this Sunday just gone were "called on account of rain." Brokers, deciding to put valor in the "bottom drawer", felt it best to "close for the day" rather than have to explain to a doubting public that the "wet basement is ONLY during unusual rains" such as these. I kept my open house going: I had not problem facing up to the sceptics about the seepage...no problem because NO ONE came.

The high school is closed today. Flooding. A few other communities are suffering the same fate. Not the flooding but having teenagers with a day off and nothing to do. I suspect the "little darlings" will spend it nursing cheap beer out of paper bags behind the Dunkin Donuts on Trapelo Road, or behind the library if the babbling brook there has not overflowed its banks. The town will fairly glow with beer cans reflecting in headlights by tonight.

I'll be out showing some properties. Let's take advantage of all this. How much off the list price can we get for a sopping basement? Time will tell....

So that's the way things are in my corner of the world in these rain swept times. Time to put on the flippers and check my own basement.

Don't Cry for Me, Agent Tina.....

Yesterday, being Washington's birthday, I decided to plaster a bit of personal honesty on Facebook -- that rightly maligned piece of crap that the kids use to coordinate their drug deals all the while being watched by B&E folks looking for a sap to tell the world he is on vacation for the next 5 days...

My bit of honesty took the review tense. It noted that I HAD been gone for 9 days. It opined that "nobody" noticed.

Today, as I check emails, messages, calls, letters, carrier pigeon guano, and all other manner of communication avenues, it is clear that my "nobody" opinion was a tad off the mark.

Herewith are a few comments that came by the assorted info-hiway splatters:

"Are you dead?!?!...I heard so, call me if you are not."

"Hey baby, you lookin' for a good time in Woburn?" (Emailer had the a wrong addy -- that's what happens when you drink mercury instead of margaritas.)

"Hey, it's me...call me, ok uhhh, I was wondering about that house." (Who are you?)

"Hey, it's me...did I just call you or did I dial wrong? OK so either way, call me."

"I'd like to order a..." (We cut that one off right there.)

"Msng U in Woburn. (What's going on up there.)

"OMFG whre hv U gone?" (Joltin' Joe has left and gone away)

"I was wondering if I can set up an appt to meet with yu and see if you think I can sell my house in Belmont" (I actually responded to that one while I was in Southern Climes)

"Viagra Cheap!" (I don't want the Viagra to be cheap...I want the DATE to be cheap!)

"Hi this is Tina from XXXXXX Realty, I mean Betty, Bettina, Elizabeth, Liza...god so like I can get so many names out of Elizabeth, and I forgot which one YOU call me, so call me." (For the record, I call her "BETH"!!!!!!!)

I guess I was missed after all...

Something from the Boston "Globe"

Just to let you know how much EVERYONE is feeling the pain...

"BOSTON – A real estate agent says a resident of Boston's upscale Back Bay section plunked down $300,000 to own what is believed to be the priciest parking space in the city's history.

"The winning bidder was not identified. The Globe reported that the seller of the parking the space is also trying to sell a two-bedroom suite in the building for $2.5 million."

Wells Fargo; Go Far Away...please

See the below article pushed forward by Wells Fargo, you know the pigs who got 25 BILLION in Tax payer funds a few month ago and JUST THIS MONTH planned to have a 12 day bash at the Wynn Las Vegas -- until the got caught. which all goes to show, self interest is alive and well...what is the use of an affordability index if no one has the confidence to spend, and no one has the confidence to spend because they feel ripped off by Wells Fargo and the other. The affordability index is out of touch -- just like Fargo and the pigs in Congress who are touching you up...Read on

Big boost for housing affordability
Les Christie, CNNMoney.com staff writer
Thursday February 19, 2009, 4:59 pm EST
Yahoo! Buzz Print Crashing home prices have led to the most affordable housing market in at least five years, according to the National Association of Home Builders/Wells Fargo Housing Opportunity Index released Thursday.

More than 60% of all U.S. homes sold during the last three months of 2008 were affordable - meaning that a family making the national median of $61,500 a year would pay 28% or less of their total income toward housing expenses.

At 62.4% affordable, the figure is up considerably from 56.1% in the previous quarter and 46.6% at the end of 2007, according to the report.

Topping the list of most affordable U.S. metro areas, which ranks areas with more than 500,000 in population, was Indianapolis. This is the city's 14th consecutive quarter in first place; it boasts a full 93% of all homes sold being affordable to median family households.

The least affordable was the New York City metro area, where only 13.9% of homes sold met the criteria.

In the fourth quarter, the national median home price fell to $190,000 from $205,700 in the previous-year period, according to a report issued last week by the National Association of Realtors. That combined with falling mortgage rates has made home buying the most affordable it has been since early 2002.

"Falling home prices and very favorable mortgage rates both contributed to the housing affordability gains we saw in the fourth quarter of 2008," NAHB Chairman Joe Robson, a homebuilder from Tulsa, Okla., said in a prepared statement.

That still wasn't enough to get moribund housing markets moving again. Existing homes sold at an annualized rate of 4.74 million in December, according to the National Association of Realtors, down from more than 7 million during the boom.

And a government report revealed that new home sales crashed to an annualized rate of 331,000 in December, the lowest since record keeping began in 1963.

"Worsening economic conditions, historically low consumer confidence and uncertainty about future home prices kept many qualified buyers on the sidelines," Robson said.

Still no buying push

That affordability has improved so much does not necessarily make people go house hunting, according to Mike Larson, a real estate analyst with Weiss Research.

"You could argue that house affordability indexes are improving but that may not be the best way of defining whether it's a good time to buy," he said. "Concerns about the economy and whether they're going to still have a job have kept many homebuyers from stepping up to the plate."

During the boom, when house affordability plunged, buyers came out in droves. They were confident in the economy and afraid that home prices would soar out of reach. Today, just the opposite applies.

"Affordability is going to get even better," said Larson. "Home prices are not done falling. Buyers recognize this. There's no sense of urgency, and rightly so."

Indeed, according to Nicholas Retsinas, director of Harvard University's Joint Center for Housing Studies, affordability, which was a major factor in homebuying during the boom, no longer matters very much. In most parts of the United States, affordability has returned to where it was in 2002 or 2003.

"The new barrier is willingness to buy," he said.

That's why one major goal of President Obama's housing-rescue plan involves slowing foreclosures to stabilize housing markets and foster consumer confidence.

"If that happens, maybe people will start thinking, 'Hey, maybe prices won't go down tomorrow,'" said Retsinas.

Most and least affordable

Affordability in Indianapolis, the 33rd largest metro area in the United States with 1.7 million people, was buoyed by fairly high median income of $65,100 and rock-bottom home prices. The median price for a home sold during the quarter was just $103,000, according to the National Association of Home Builders report.

Those prices, combined with reasonable mortgage interest rates, make home-buying in the area a snap. A buyer of a median-priced home putting 20% down would pay only about $450 a month in mortgage expenses.

But even though house buying costs are reasonable, the city's weakening economy meant it did not escape the foreclosure plague. More than 20,000 homes, representing nearly 3% of the city, received a foreclosure filing of some kind in 2008, the 26th highest rate in the nation.

Other most affordable towns were: Warren, Mich. (89.6%); Youngstown, Ohio (89.4%); and Detroit (89.3%).

In the New York City metro area, home prices took a steep dive during the quarter, to $455,000 from $500,000 three months earlier. But even that was not enough to dislodge the city from its rank as the most unaffordable metro area in the land.

Median income in the area is $63,000, less than in Indianapolis and, with home prices more than four times higher than in the Midwestern metropolis, only 13.9% of the homes sold there were affordable to median income families.

That was still a major improvement from two years ago, when only 5.1% of homes sold during the fourth quarter of 2006 were affordable. And New York households have been barely brushed by foreclosure so far with only 0.71% receiving some kind of foreclosure filing during 2008.

Other least-affordable metro areas included San Francisco at 20.6%, where affordability improved greatly from 5.7% during the second quarter of 2007; suburban Long Island, where 25.5% were affordable; and Los Angeles, where 26.9% were.

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Toys for Tots

Drop off your toys at 161 Mount Auburn St. in Watertown. Yesterday someone dropped off a great baseball glove; we've got two bicycles and lots of dolls...some kool games that all of us will remember...I promise I won't play with anything -- although that Playdough looks mighty inviting...

Open house here 4-8 PM on December 12 -- This Friday night upcoming. Cocktails and Hors D'Oeuves served. Last year I had kids playing floor hockey in the basement -- this year. Maybe this year the old folks will play, too.

CALL ME AT 617.470.8085 FOR INFO.

Active Interests

It seems, from the time I came to New England (I am not native to these grey climes), folks have ever taken an overly active interest in my life. This has not has the best of impacts on me, and, in fact, has caused the loss of many things most dear to me.

So it is that with great trepidation that I responded to the following inquiry:

“Didn’t I see you at the Skating Club of Boston?”

Now seeing me there is no great achievement. I am a member of that old club. I am a regular visitor there, and can be seen there every Monday night throughout the year (yes, summer too) refereeing the Monday Night Learn to Skate Programs for the little ones. I also may be seen there on summer Saturdays coaching the hockey. On other occasions, I am there watching my investment scar the hard ice with cold steel. So I was watching when the inquiry targeting that investment brought out and scotched up my defensive “cockles”.

“ I saw you talking to Hanako. What do you know about her?”

Other than the fact that she is 7th grade age? Other than the fact that she costs me $2,000 A WEEK to keep in her training? Other than the fact that I DO believe she will be the next great figure skater to come out of these United States? Other than the fact that she has an outer “worldiness” decades beyond her pre-teen years, I know nothing about her.

So came the litany of familiar questions: how long has she been skating, howmanyhoursdoessheskate is shehomeschooled and blahblahblah and how did they find her for the HBO thing and the NBC thing and …

To all of it, I am, evasive – protective of my investment -- but I did answer 2 questions. Her name means little flower in some Asian flavor and she plays the violin, and yes, to ramble on, I bought her the violins from 1/8 size up to full.

What does this all have to do with Real Estate? Well, perhaps it is the REAL part. Life goes on for someone – a chance I never had, or perhaps a reflection of things taken away, and I am grateful she is allowing me to come along for the ride even if I must pay the very expensive million dollar ticket.

NO JOKE -- New Real Estate Laws and Issues

On Thursday, December 20th, President Bush signed into law a bill passed by Congress: HR 3648 –Mortgage Forgiveness Debt Relief Act of 2007.
The three major points are:
· Elimination of the “phantom tax” on foreclosures, short sales or other discharges of debt on a primary residence. Consider this scenario: A property is worth $250,000, and the mortgage balance is $300,000. Under the old rules, if a lender forgave the $50k difference as part of a foreclosure, short sale, refinance or loan modification, the borrower had to claim the $50k as income and pay federal income taxes on that amount. The new law eliminates this “phantom tax”, and the forgiven debt is no longer treated as taxable income to the borrower as long as certain requirements are met, such as the discharged mortgage balance must be on the taxpayer’s principal residence.
· The tax deduction for mortgage insurance premiums is now extended until December 31, 2010 instead of expiring at the end of 2007. The same rules apply as before in terms of the income limitations etc.
Those with adjusted gross incomes up to $100,000 receive the full break, but the deduction reduces 10% for every $1,000 over $100,000 until it reaches zero at an adjusted gross income of $110,000.
· The capital gains exclusion is now $500,000 instead of $250,000 for an unmarried individual who sells their primary residence within 2 years of the time their spouse has died. This new guideline applies to sales after December 31, 2007, and provides relief for widows and widowers by giving them a 2 year window from the time their spouse has died to sell their home and receive the $500,000 exclusion. Of course, the same rules apply as before, where the individual(s) need to have lived in the home as their primary residence for 2 out of the last 5 years.
Yet to be determined…
On October 17, 2007 the Office of the Attorney General amended 940 CMR 8.00
et. seq., the regulation under the Consumer Protection Act that identifies unfair and
deceptive acts or practices in connection with mortgage brokering and mortgage lending.
The new amended regulations were issued following an extensive comment period and
after four hearings were held statewide between September 18 and 21, 2007. The new
regulations will take effect on January 2, 2008.
Massachusetts’ Attorney General Martha Coakley’s new mortgage regulations have forced national lenders like Wells Fargo to drastically adjust their business practices in the Bay State — which includes no longer paying yield spread premium to its brokers. Who else is dismissing YSP and which lender is pulling the plug on business in the state altogether?
Massachusetts prohibits certain activities and requires that all mortgage loans be in the borrower's best interests. Furthermore, a mortgage loan broker's interest cannot conflict with the borrower's best interest.

It's the holidays

"Hey cut me some slack. It's the holidays."

I heard that little plea for "mercy and charity" in South Boston yesterday. A unique choice of wording, but then, it was in front of the Boston Beer Works emporium, not exactly the place one goes to hear performances of Robert Frost -- that is Robert Frost, the poet, not to be confused with the more famous near name sharer who put on a hat and "came to life one day".

The two gentlemen were debating a certain space on the road. One thought it fit his car rather well, the other thought his lawn chair -- at that moment in the spot -- looked just fine and dandy there, thank you, and wanted to keep it there, at least until the "Mrs." returned from the local Stop and Shop with the last minute goodies.

Readers, I am sure you get the drift -- they were fighting over a parking space.

Mind you, these pugilists fighting over 8 feet of tarmac were in my way; just in front of me was the chair, blocking my access to the thoroughfare was the Buick. My geographic expert readers will be able to plot with all the precision of a Garmon that I was, in fact, parked behind them and trying to get out.

"Fellas," I exhaled throught the window, "you think..."

"Hey, cut me some slack, it's the holidays". was the return. I was humbled and cut off.

So much for being nice. Here we provide a transcipt of the further dialog for the readers' edification in the interests of brevity.

Al: "You! Yeah you, you c--k sucking mo--er f--king sons of Bi--ches. Move your m----- f------ sh-t out of my way or I'll get out of this f------ car and kick your f------ Irish asses back to Cork!

Man1 "Oh. sorry, did you want to get out?"

Al. "What the f--- do you think, you f------ ass li--ker?

Man2 "Oh hold it, let me move the car back. I need your spot, anyway, thanks.

And so it all goes, peace for the holidays.

And a great lesson. One really needs to speak the language when traveling in foreign climes, especially if the clime is "Southie".