Cond-OH!!!-nos in Belmont Sales up in 2011 so far...

Surprise, surprise... Belmont, the town that boasts itself as "THE TOWN OF HOMES", saw some "non-home action"! While the single home situation languishes in what folks say is the snow storm malaise (4 sales for January and February -- the worst ever), condominium sales in Belmont had their best year EVER in transactions as well as average price (aided by 2 big gun "Mitt Romney type" townhomes in the Woodlands)!

15 Condos had the ol' master deed docs and 6D's done over for new owners in January and February of 2011. That "one-ups" the previous best (2006) by ONE. Average price? 537k; taking out 2007's previously "Ruthian" tab of 512k. It took agents 108 days to get the job done; you have to go back to 2006 to find "better days" (2006 did it in an average of 97 days).

We can speculate on what this means for "The Town of Homes"; have we priced ourselves out of the market? or is Belmont going through the inevitable "Cambridgeification?...or perhaps is it what I call the "Condo-many-of-them Syndrome"...so many of them for sale.

A quick look at MLS shows us that as of this morning (3/3/11) there are 27 Single family homes for sale in Belmont: average offering price $1,076,000. And Condos?...well surprise, surprise there is a neat bookend of ALSO 27 condos for sale (average offer price $521k). One would think all is parity, but let us dig a tad deeper:

In the last 6 months, 5 single family home listings went EXPIRED -- read that as failed to sell during contract time. 21 condos struck out in that same period of time. It seems there is a "Shadow Market in Condos". Lots of folks want to sell 'em but they know there is no one to buy 'em. It is sort of like all those souls who have just given up on looking for a job and, as such, are NO LONGER counted in unemployment stats.

The crux of the problem may well go back to the craze that took off around 2004 when lots of 2 families were bought up and converted to condos: I call that the era of Con-DUMB-iniums and have written about it in these pages (search under the "Condominium Category" to the right, and you will find it). These condo buyers were newbies in a new strange land -- a "Town of Townhouses" (really flats that echo with he footfalls of the upstairs neighbor), and now they want out -- but they can't get out. And we are not even talking about the "under water owners".

What does this all mean? Who knows (again), but maybe agents should put on their urban thinking caps and start talking about Belmont as a "City of Apartment Dwellers" instead of a Town of Homes. It may well add up to a few more paychecks

Un-Staging

Everybody knows about staging. Okay, so maybe a few of you good folks do not, so by way of quick explanation, "Staging" is a concept wherein a seller prepares the home for sale by doing cockamamie things that the "home stagers" tell you will sell your home FASTFASTFAST.

Now, folks, you and I know that so nobody is fooled by some bric-a-brac bought at the local Homegoods store, or candles burning in the alcove. We ALL know that in order to sell a home FASTFASTFAST, you have to price it RIGHTRIGHTRIGHT.

I have never been one for staging. It all looks so phony to me. I walk into a "staged" home and I think of Ikea; I smell the scented candles and I want to sneeze at best (at worst, I want to look behind the fridge for the mildew).

No folks, I do not like staging, but that does not mean I am in favor of UN-STAGING...

UN-Staging is a concept I developed. I tell my clients that we must make sure not to unstage and they ask, "What, perchance is that?"

Un-staging is what I call the act of NOT doing those things that will turn off a buyer or, at best, mitigate against a favorable offer. Herewith is a list of UN-Staging items -- things we should not do:

Do not leave the foreclosure notice on the dining room table -- No one is going to up their offer for your home if they know you are in hock up to your hams. Likewise the overdue bills.

Do not show off your pets -- Fido suffers from "bad breath in dog's mouth", sorry to tell you that (you smell just like him after all these years of letting him sit in your lap). No one thinks your dog is cute. As soon as I see a free range dog, I begin to wonder where is the wee-wee stain from those paper training days.

Cats -- forget it, lock 'em up. Every five minutes they are hurling a hair ball; the litter box stinks and the food on the floor is gross.

Hubby -- if the man of the house uses male enhancement, for goodness sakes, hide the bottle; do not leave it on the dresser. We ALL know what goes on in the bedroom, and we may even go to a movie and watch Sasha Gray do it in mind boggling concatenations of styling, but we DO NOT want to think about YOU doing it. While you are at it,...change the bedsheets.

We have all been told that cooking makes a buyer feel all warm and fuzzy, but DO NOT leave the stew on the stove during a showing. The whole recipe is going to boil down to a tarry mass while you are gone and the house will stink like burnt rubber.

I love fireplaces, but do NOT leave 'em going when I show up with a prospective buyer. The only message that can come of this is, "What kind of a moron lives here who would light a fireplace and leave?"

Do not put the dirty diapers into the diaper bin -- they still stink! You just can't smell it anymore. Put the whole bin outside. While you are at it, take down some of Junior's picture. Too many pictures makes the house look too well lived in.

Don't use the basement for storage! If "ya got" clutter, rent a place. Boxes piled high just look like you are hiding something.

Hide the magazine collections. We are all very impressed knowing you read the New Yorker...this week's issue is just fine, but we DON'T need to see them going back to 1965.

Don't leave 3 weeks of leftovers in the fridge. It smells, and at any rate, the fridge may well be part of the offer. Even if it is not, the buyers are going to open it.

Do you really need to leave that box of Trojan's in the medicine cabinet? Do you really need to leave the "Girls Gone Wild" DVDs on the night rest? If you do, at least leave a copy of Citizen Kane there.

DO NOT vacuum TOMORROW! Do it today.

Do not soak the dishes.

Do NOT smoke...EVER. In fact, stop smoking TEN YEARS before you decide to sell. That is how long the nicotine is going to take to dry out of your wall board.

Don't leave fancy chocolates around...good ol' Hershey works just fine. I mean, it might not have an impact on selling the home but, well, what I mean is...I like Hershey...

A Friend in Need Should NOT Be a Friend (IN)Deed

She comes to me and says, "We were together for 5 years. It seemed only natural."

My friend here (ALL my friends are women), was showing me shapshots of the renovated kitchen in the condo she bought "yonder" about 8 years ago. "I mean," she postured, "We did so much work on the place, together, and he seemed to be the perfect guy!"

Now, folks, those of you who know me, can well attest that I work magic on women -- I make 'em disappear! I bring this up to point out that IF I knew what was the perfect man, I would have fashioned myself to be one long ago....So I asked her, "Perfect? How so."

"Well, single, never married, no kids, fortyish, living with his mother..." I lose it there...Any woman who thinks a forty-year-old living with is mother is perfect, well...'nuf said on that!

"So," she continues, "it was only natural. It seemed so normal to do it....And then I find out -- he's been in so many affairs that he should be a caterer! And he comes to me and tells me he's got some girl pregnant and, get this...he wonders if maybe it might be best if WE raise the child as OUR own!" And off she goes to Sobbingland.

"Well throw Old Lochinvar out, for crissake," I say.

"But I can't."

"Listen, honey," I move in for the heart-to-heart, "this is no time to play the conscience, the guy's a bum with a wet wick..."

"No it is not that," she cries, "we were an 'US'; a together, a 'WE'...so last year, I put his name on the deed. I can't throw him out; he owns the place too!" (And now even I'M crying!) "Yes, last year, while he was shakin' and bakin' in Miss GirlScoutCookie's oven, I was off at the lawyer changing the ownership of this place from a 'ME' to a 'WE'. On our 'quote' anniversary, 'unquote', I showed it to him. So Ya see, I can't throw him out, no more than he can throw me out! And he can bring his damn cupcake in with him, I suppose and we can all do a 3-some, or maybe THEY do a 2-some while I burp the baby." And inconsolable tears aplenty pour forth.

Readers, when words fail me (and they DO NOT FAIL very often), I think of cleavage, and here, words failed me... For a few short moments, I thought about how my friend would look in a shred of lingerie from the Frederick's of Hollywood collection (this situation was WELL beyond Victoria's Secret stuttering!).

"Uhhh, yeah," I say, my "unShakesperean moment continuing, "Uhh ya," and I say the only thing I can say, "Call your attorney."

Who knows, maybe it all can be undone. Maybe there is something in deceitful intent...but one thing is for certain -- don't make a friend, indeed, a friend IN DEED.

Value Added Investment Grade? One step at a Time

Agents live for broker tours. For those not of the "cognoscenti", a broker tour is like an Open House, except it is an Open House for the "elect" -- read that for only brokers. It is a chance for a listing agent to show a property to other agents in the hope they may well have a client who would like the home. Agents going on tour do not necessarily like the Broker Tours for this -- they like it for the free food that is usually spread out by the Listing Agent to entice the traffic. For example, in my corner of the world, "lunch" is served in Belmont, Arlington and Cambridge on Tuesdays, Wednesday it is Newton, and Friday it is Watertown and Waltham (yum yum). Other towns in my area have their days...check an agent's GPS history and you can figure that out for Medford, Lexington, Wellesley, Brookline and so on.

The other day, I go to this broker tour. I am cheerfully met at the door by a sprightly young agent (I know she is young...the low cut sweater [a Cashmere Over Sized Cowl Tunic from Michael Star; $326] that she wears is slightly amiss at the left shoulder exposing not just a maroon bra strap [Victoria's Secret], but also the wing of an angel tattoo pricked into the skin, I surmise, after a long night with some Brown University frat boy(s?) -- I recognize the work...Ronnie's Tattoo, Providence, RI; $89.99).

"Welcome," she says, and, "Oh, could you please remove your shoes?"

Now readers, at my stage in life and in this place and time, I should be excited when a woman asks me to remove ANY article of my clothing, in this case, if for nothing else, for the one second of fantasy that this person has a foot fetish. Alas, sadly, she spoke too fast and cut all "fantasm" to the quick.

"It is the rugs," she imparts, "they are collector quality."

For the first time, I looked below the agent's torso, passed the Eileen Fisher Stretch Ponte Pencil Skirt (Sak's Fifth Avenue, $158), down the finely waxed calves (Li Kim Thuy's Nail and Wax Shop [bikini lines a specialty], Dorchester, perhaps?) and down to the bare feet ("Shoeless" Joe Jackson; Chicago White Sox, 1919). Off to the right was an imitation brass scupper (Home and Hearth, $68), and neatly resting in it were the agent's shoes; black high heeled "court pumps" from Redoute Creations, Paris (40 Euros or 60 bucks at current exchange rates).

"You see," she continued, "the rugs are all quite pricey. This one is an Isfahan and over there in the sitting room is a Bakhshaish. This runner is a Hussainaba. They are investments!"

Now folks, I really do not want to talk rugs here, but rugs as an investment?...I mean if you want people to just stamp and stomp all over your investments, that is O.K, but why not just give your money to Wall Street? That's what they down there everyday.

"Uh, huh," I say as I remove my shoes (PayLess $14.99 Buy-One-Get-One-Free [BOGO]), thanking God for the wisdom of that trip to Marshall's the day before (New black socks, slightly irregular, 6 pair; $3.99). As I am doing this, I am searching about for the route to the kitchen and the free lunch platter laid out. After all, all I want, all ALL agents want is a sandwich and maybe a Coke to go (free at Broker Tours; $1.59 at 7-11; remember to cash in the can and you come out a nickel to the good!).

"And," she points out, "all the collectibles on the walls!", and she directs my attention to the shelves and cut outs and nooks and crannies filled with bric-a-bracs, porcelains and potteries of all manner of invention.

"Listen," I say, still looking beyond her slender posterior for the platter (do I smell roast beef!?), "I don't know, kiddo...you are going to bring a lot of people into this house and with all these nicknacks about, well...I'd be afraid that some of them are going to get 'paddy-whacked'...and you'll be the one that will have to, shall we say, 'give the dog the bone' if you get my drift". She didn't, apparently she is too young for the "This-Old-Man-He-Plays-One" joke motif.

"Come again?" she says, and I reply something to the effect that at my age, I would need a good dose of Viagra to do that (she didn't get that joke either).

"I don't understand," she says.

I tell her, "What I mean is...it's the stuff...no one -- not even you!!! -- will be looking at the house. It is ALL stuff. First you ask folks to take off their shoes...what if they have a hole in their sock?" (Thank God [again] I went to Marshalls!), "then they walk into this museum. Let me tell ya, honey, people want to live in a house, not a museum. You know who lives in a museum?...King Tut lives in a museum, and for him that's an upgrade, 'cause before that he was living in a freaking hole in the desert for 3 thousand years!. Folks want to see if their entertainment center from Jordan's Furniture will fit here. They want to see the glow of the hardwood floors; they don't want to tip-toe around some magic carpet smuggled out of Pakistan. For your sake and for the sake of your client, you need to get this place cleaned up. You're not selling admission tickets here...you are selling a house."

She begins a retort of some sort, but I am gone; I see the snake route to the kitchen and the spread; catered by Rebecca's!!! ooooh!, Turkey, Tuna, Veggie, and ROAST BEEF on SOUR DOUGH ROLLS ($7.99 each), a bag of Cape Cod Chips ($1.19)...and a Diet Coke.........TO GO.

Terminal-ology

A description from one of my sold listings follows:

This convenient 2 family in the desirable West End features newer vinyl siding, new replacement windows, new heating and hot water systems, updated electric, as well as a pristine and just renovated second floor unit along with other bonuses. Enjoy great rent potential in a home that is close to public transportation and area amenities.

Ya see what we got there? Keep it in mind as we digress...

Back in the day when I was a lad, a friend came to me and asked wouldst I proffer to him my time and disposition to make success of a double date. His plan was to go bowling; he with his "amour" on their third foray and I, well, she has a cousin, a cousin who was visiting, I may have surmised from the "farm". Naturally, I asked of the pertinent qualities and he responded with, "She's great...she's a really nice person, fun to be around...she's got a great personality."

I passed on the blind date. I figured that if the best asset to be offered was the fun-to-be-around, great personality, then I might as well get it on with Ronald McDonald because at least he wears a balloon nose over his ugly face.

I bring this up because, in fact, many years later I saw that blind date. She was with my friend. My friend catches me in a Bruegger's and calls me over to meet his wife, a local TV personality, and the conversation went like this:

"XXXX, this is my friend, Al....Al, this is my wife, XXXX (although, if you watch the weather, I think you know that."
"Pleased," I say.
"You know, honey," my friend says, "This is the guy I wanted to set you up with when you first moved here." Hollow laughs all around.
"Well, I am glad he said 'No' ", she said and off they went.

A few days later I tagged him by phone:

"Yeah, so what was that," I inject, "You dumped the girlfriend and take up with the cousin?"
"Could have been yours, pal, could have been yours."
"Except you told me she was a dog...you told me she had a uhhh 'great personality'..."
"And she does..."
"But," I say, "With all due respect, why did you try to sell me on that bill of goods. I was twenty. You're selling me Emily Dickinson when I wanted to buy Sharon Stone, for crissakes."
"Well...you were a sensitive guy. I gave you sensitive..."

So what the hell is the point of this story? The point of this story is the wording. A "sell" word can well be terminal to a sale if not properly placed. Folks are wary of words; they can mean many things, and in most cases, they mean to dislodge and up end belief.

So it is with Real Estate descriptions and the words we use. I try not to use the buzz words -- buzz words create obfuscation. So herewith are some buzz words and what I feel they mean to a reader:

Cozy -- small

Close to Shops -- every rummy in town will piss on your privet hedges as he walks by on his way to the "Packy".

Unique -- stupid

Family room -- basement

Wet bar -- basement has a sink

Au pair -- basement has a bed where the owner's son used to hump his girlfriend

County like -- you will be mowing the lawn every day

Won't last -- it will be going to foreclosure soon

Meticulously maintained -- has not had a thing done to it since Eisenhower was in office

Quiet Street -- the town does not maintain it

Lots of storage -- wet basement

Open architecture -- you know when anyone goes into the can

Half bath -- they turned a closet into a "Throne Room"

Easy access -- it is on a main drag

Expandable -- you can finish the attic once you get the squirrels out of it

Tudor -- rooms in the attic

Old charmer -- Ugly

Historic -- previous owner was a sex offender

Great school -- high taxes

Desirable -- high taxes

Small town feel -- high taxes

Period detail -- rotten moulding

Sweat Equity -- you will never get it done; hire a contractor

MICRO economics in Belmont

It has been a long and dispiriting spring followed by a dismal summer that saw long time stores shutter up all around my little corner of the world. The Auto Parts guy in Cushing Square is in the process of pulling his spark plugs -- the EVERYTHING MUST GO sign screams across Common Street. No more can a soul buy fudge down Trapelo Road, and the print shop one passes on the way has run out of ink -- the building is now forlorn and for sale. An electrician has moved into the storefront that was once a takeout chicken joint: "I don't need a store front," he told me, "but the price was right." The old bookstore in the center of town

Of all the shuttered businesses about, the one that is most surprising is my maid: she stopped coming in June. For the better part of ten years, she had been mopping and wiping the the ne'er-do-well issue of my life, finding shoes I have left scattered about, washing dishes, putting the glow on my hardwoods, vacuuming out of the rug the evidence of my retreating hairline, and in general working her skill on those things and utilities about which modesty forbids description.

I did some "jungle drum" research into the woebegone circumstances...it appears she was illegal, I have been told. She was a regular traveller to and back from Brazil. As far As I can guess, she did the trip one too many times. I have been visited by at least seven "new" Brazilians, all claiming to be the extension of my maid's business. I have chosen none of them.

If the dismal summer taught me anything, it was a real lesson in MACROeconomics by way of the MICRO. You see, I have been sweeping the floors myself, mopping, putting away my shoes, and what nots, and doing exactly all the things I should have been doing in the first place. My home is tidy, fit for me, if not for a king, AND I am saving 63 smackers a week -- that's 63 bucks staying inside the US economy, yup 63 bucks a week that I will use here -- maybe an extra Trombone lesson for the kid, or maybe, after a year, well let us see -- that is almost $3,300 dollars! That is the down payment on that new Chevy Cruze that is going to be the hot car of 2011!

They say that illegals are doing jobs WE do not want to do. I say, they are doing jobs that need NOT be done. We are overly conspicuous in our consumption. We do not need some of the services we buy. As a cleaner, I am doing just fine, thank you...a few minutes a day here and there and I am at one with my home. I have reconnected with the nooks and crannies (and found things I should have discarded years ago not to mention things I should have held closer to my thoughts, but instead dumped behind the file cabinets). And, of course, there is the exercise; I am feeling fit and trim as I putter about the halls of the castle, deep-kneeing my way into the closets and squatting to swipe the dust from under the futon.

And I have begun to think -- what if we all cleaned our own homes, mowed our lawn lawns, did our own nails? In my corner of the world, the landscaper's truck and trailer is longer than the street frontage of many homes...do we really need their services? Are we so busy at the gym that we cannot find 15 minutes and get our exercise pushing the rotaries across the grass?

For me, I see a win win...my apparently illegal maid has left the country, a situation that most folks feel needs to be replicated 10 million more times...and I have a new stash of cash in my pocket. What to do with it?...a great economic question, stay tuned.

"Ducking" the Weather

There are ducks swimming in my backyard...not in the little pond at the northwest corner, but in the yard where, at about this time every year, I begin the annual toil of planting happy grass and expunging, well, crab grass. Not today.

It appears the water table has risen above the banks of the pond, and the pond has made ownership of a substantial swath of the yard. I noticed a fish in a place that would normally make it a "fish out of water". I had hoped the little adventurer wold submarine itself back to the deeper climes of the pond, but sadly, that did not happen;...an aquatic squirrel tip-toed through the shallows and made a "canape" of the "carp."

Many open houses on this Sunday just gone were "called on account of rain." Brokers, deciding to put valor in the "bottom drawer", felt it best to "close for the day" rather than have to explain to a doubting public that the "wet basement is ONLY during unusual rains" such as these. I kept my open house going: I had not problem facing up to the sceptics about the seepage...no problem because NO ONE came.

The high school is closed today. Flooding. A few other communities are suffering the same fate. Not the flooding but having teenagers with a day off and nothing to do. I suspect the "little darlings" will spend it nursing cheap beer out of paper bags behind the Dunkin Donuts on Trapelo Road, or behind the library if the babbling brook there has not overflowed its banks. The town will fairly glow with beer cans reflecting in headlights by tonight.

I'll be out showing some properties. Let's take advantage of all this. How much off the list price can we get for a sopping basement? Time will tell....

So that's the way things are in my corner of the world in these rain swept times. Time to put on the flippers and check my own basement.

Sellin' the "Crib" for a new career

The caricature to the left is of the Salwens; Mr. and daughter Kevin and Hannah. It appears on page 23 of the March 15, 2010 of the New Yorker. The Salwens for those who have not heard are, now (at least for this week), writers with a successful book, and wanderlusts on a successful book tour bringing in the dough. Their book, The Power of Half details their story and subsequent "journey" spiritual journey, that is (oh brother!), not the book tour pay per speech journery tour that brought them to New York recently from their backwater hovel in Atlanta (actually it was an $800,000 home with an elevator, YES an elevator but why haggle).

Your see, the Selwens have this precocious (some would say obnoxious)daughter (that would be Hannah), now 15 or so, who, in 2006 as the family stopped at a red light, saw two men: a homeless rummy to the left and a rich folkster in a Mercedes to the right. She posited that if the guy to the right in the German car did not have such a good car (read that as not all the money he had), the rummy to the left would be able to have a meal (read that as government hand-out).

Ahhh, says the moron father...yes, but but but, and the kid says NO BUTS WE NEED TO GIVE IT ALL AWAY so that the rummies of the world can get to Burger King STAT! The father should have cut it off right there telling the kid she has no business suggesting the dispersal of HIS hard earned samoleons. Ditto, the father should have cut it off right there by telling the brat that, perhaps, the guy to the left (rummy) should ask the guy to the right for a job, and that what the kid is proposing is communism -- from each accrding to his abilites to each according to his needs. But Karl Marx NEVER did put together a best seller on that score (and it appears the Salwens have; see Barnes and Noble), but that is getting ahead of our opus.

To make that long story short, the Salwens SOLD their home for $800k, elevator and all, and gave half dough away to some seed eaters in Ghana (what ever happened to that Atlanta rummy right around the corner from them?).

And now, they are on the book tour.

We posit a few points here:

At first I was pondering saying what a true moron the guy is, but hey, the guy's got quite a financial head on his shoulders. Wealth is all fluid -- Look at it this way...he sells the ranch for a good a good bowl of rice, puts on the sneakers and runs for the hills. That's one way around the housing crisis.

But even better, he invests HALF of what he sells by dumping it off to some cuckholds out of the country (out of the country because inside the U.S.A. we could actually see how useless it is to give money to porch-sitters). I say "invests", because he writes the book about the experience and now he's rolling in the dough from Amazon, B&N, and all other sorts of cash registers, doing the tours, doing voice books and becoming a celebrity of the benificent type, just like that little girl who wrote a letter to Gorbachev in the 1980's (by the way, that kid died when she was about 13, I believe, in a private plane crash on way to a publicity event).

There is a moral to this story:

There are many folks who've come forward with interesting ways to sell a home and maximize profits in these hard times -- staging, loan take backs, point buy downs, rent-to-owns, who knows?..., but this guy wins the contest.

He sold his house for a best selling book writing career.

Bravo

Don't Cry for Me, Agent Tina.....

Yesterday, being Washington's birthday, I decided to plaster a bit of personal honesty on Facebook -- that rightly maligned piece of crap that the kids use to coordinate their drug deals all the while being watched by B&E folks looking for a sap to tell the world he is on vacation for the next 5 days...

My bit of honesty took the review tense. It noted that I HAD been gone for 9 days. It opined that "nobody" noticed.

Today, as I check emails, messages, calls, letters, carrier pigeon guano, and all other manner of communication avenues, it is clear that my "nobody" opinion was a tad off the mark.

Herewith are a few comments that came by the assorted info-hiway splatters:

"Are you dead?!?!...I heard so, call me if you are not."

"Hey baby, you lookin' for a good time in Woburn?" (Emailer had the a wrong addy -- that's what happens when you drink mercury instead of margaritas.)

"Hey, it's me...call me, ok uhhh, I was wondering about that house." (Who are you?)

"Hey, it's me...did I just call you or did I dial wrong? OK so either way, call me."

"I'd like to order a..." (We cut that one off right there.)

"Msng U in Woburn. (What's going on up there.)

"OMFG whre hv U gone?" (Joltin' Joe has left and gone away)

"I was wondering if I can set up an appt to meet with yu and see if you think I can sell my house in Belmont" (I actually responded to that one while I was in Southern Climes)

"Viagra Cheap!" (I don't want the Viagra to be cheap...I want the DATE to be cheap!)

"Hi this is Tina from XXXXXX Realty, I mean Betty, Bettina, Elizabeth, Liza...god so like I can get so many names out of Elizabeth, and I forgot which one YOU call me, so call me." (For the record, I call her "BETH"!!!!!!!)

I guess I was missed after all...

Happy Birthday Internet

Forty years ago today, a message "lo" was sent from the University of California to The Stanford Institute. It was the FIRST Internet message (Al Gore was NOT there). With this in mind I look about the Real Estate world and what do I see? Nothing. Nothing has changed. In fact in spite of what they say, 89% of buyers go the the broker they know, not the one the Internet. Internet sites may give someone information, but when it comes to hard knocks, folks are knocking on the local doors. So keep on texting folks, everybody knows my name (and my face well, in the flesh). Its all good for business here on the cement highway...

"Swine" Flu

What with all the the talk of the above noted malady, there seems to be a trend towards NOT shaking hands. This, the idea of "shaking hands" in itself, begs a full article, what with countless pointers and directions about time, speed, and intensity of grip all playing into the A, B, C personality crap, but herewith, we are focusing on an singular episode. Read on...

Yesterday, I was asked to escort an agent to his new listing -- a BIG home; grand in all scales, not the least of them all was its age as well as the age of the owner. The owner, an elderly matron had, it seems, raised a whole family of children in the home. Those seedlings, now all sprung to full bloom in diaspora fashion across the globe, and husband, now gone to reward, the elderly woman decided to put the home on the market:

"Such a big home for such a small old lady," she said as my young agent friend brought me forward.

"Mrs. XXXXX, I want you to meet Al. He's my mentor, a great guy who knows everything about this area."

"Hello," she says, with a stern look of motherly scorn.

"Pleased to meet you," I say and I reach out to, yes, shake her hand...

"Heavens no," she says, and she recoils a feeble step.

"Oh, I am ever so sorry," I aver, "what with all the talk of swine flu and shaking hands, what must I have been thinking?"

Just then she applies: It has nothing to do with swine flu, young man. I just do not want to shake YOUR hand, now or ever! You were a bad boy, a bad little boy...do you know how long it took me to get those stickers off the bathroom mirror?!?!"

Stickers, bathroom mirror...oh yes, Bugs Bunny, Foghorn Leghorn, Yosemite Sam, and yes Porky Pig...I just have been 4 years old when I visited a strange home, for what reason I shall never know, and in a moment of childhood creativity, found some stokers in a room somewhere and plastered them all over a mirror. IT WAS THIS HOUSE!

"Bad boy," she said. You left without telling anyone. You deserved to be fully reprimanded. You were a sloppy dirty little pig of a child. I hope you have corrected yourself!

I am, again, 4 years old.....

"Now go...," she points to the kitchen, "in there, on the counter is aplate of fresh cookies. Take a napkin, and NO crumbs, I say!"

Back to School Redux

A lot of folks in my corner of the world seemed a bit put off by my flippant remarks and clear joy at the return of school. Unapologetic to the end, I hearwith join my Navy heritage to the return to school. Let's all sing along to the tune of "Anchor's Away!"

My kid's away, thank god!
My kid's away...
She's off at boarding school
for Ninety bucks a day ay ay, HEY!

'Though it's a lot to pay,
no gripes you'll see.
'Cause if there are,
then they will
ship her back,
they'll ship her back to me!

In My LIttle Corner of the World

In my little corner of the world, the kids are going back to school. Today... Yesterday, you could sense the emotion; the little ones were out in force on the nice day, soaking up the sun, trying to get in the last bit of play. I spent much of the day in a park. It was interesting to see the dynamics: for the kids, gone were the camps and rules. Left to their own devices, they made games out of rocks and sticks, jumping and running, scoring on a point system that was duly invented for the moment and is now forgotten.

There seemed to be more bicycles out and about on this last day. A few kids were testing out new sneakers. Some older kids, high school bound, were jockeying for position on the bully ladder, using fashion the way, in my day, they used a fist.

Some parents are tearful as that whole "sunrise, sunset" thing kicks in. Others are thoughtful at the "circle of life" gig going on. A couple skulking in the corner are fully giddy at the prospect of the kids gone -- they are having an affair.

In a few days, the patterns that will dictate our lives will full into place, and we will all move on, a bit diminished by the last summer gone in a fast declining decade.

For those of us in real estate, the fall means a return to business: folks will re-assess themselves, make "New Year" resolutions and wonder, wonder about what to do next. Homes will be marketed, and homes will be sold.

So it goes in Belmont. Summer comes to a crashing end. This morning feels cold, although it is, according to the weather service, just like yesterday. But take heart -- Labor Day is just around the corner.

A Toot of the Horn to Belmont

The NAMM (National Association of Music Merchants) Foundation today (April 16, 2009) announced the results of its tenth annual “Best Communities for Music Education” survey, which acknowledges schools and districts across the U.S. for their commitment and support of music education in schools. As the economy challenges state and local school budgets to adequately support education, the 124 school districts named by the NAMM Foundation demonstrate the unwavering commitment to provide music education for their students. The NAMM Foundation’s mission is to ensure that all children have access to quality music education programs that encourage lifelong participation in music making.

"The potential of music to help children reach their full development is understood by the school districts represented in this year’s survey results,” said Mary Luehrsen, executive director, NAMM Foundation. “We celebrate these communities that are committed to providing access to music education programs and bettering the lives of their students.”
The 2009 survey, which opened on Thursday January 15, and ended Friday, March 13, was available to all districts nationwide. This year, teachers and school district administrators, representing communities across the country, participated in the Web-based survey. The districts were measured across curricular and programmatic criteria as well as public support of their music programs. The survey was developed and administered by The Institute for Educational Research and Public Service, ! an affiliate of the University of Kansas.

Participants in the survey answered detailed questions about funding, graduation requirements, music class participation, instruction time, facilities, support for the music program, and other relevant factors in their communities’ music education programs. The responses were verified with district officials, and advisory organizations reviewed the data.
Throughout the survey’s ten years, many districts have reported that making the “Best Communities” list has had a positive effect on their ability to preserve music for their students amid budget cuts in arts programs.

In conducting the annual survey, the NAMM Foundation is joined by advisory organizations in the fields of music and education including, Americans for the Arts (www.americansforthearts.org), League of American Orchestras (www.americanorchestras.org), The Mr. Holland’s Opus Foundation (www.mhopus.org), The Metropolitan Opera Guild (www.operaed.org), Music for All (www.musicforall.org), Music Teachers National Association (www.mtna.org), National Guild of Community Schools of the Arts (www.nationalguild.org), National PTA (www.pta.org), Yamaha Corpora! tion of America (www.yamaha.com) and VH1 Save The Music Foundation (www.vh1savethemusic.com). The survey was conducted by The Institute for Educational Research and Public Service of Lawrence, KS, an affiliate of the University of Kansas.

Go to http://www.namm.org/news/press-releases/nationwide-survey-finds-best-communities-music-edu for the complete listing of school districts.

I love these reports

See below...nothing like a trade group to BEG!!!! oh please buy something. They forget...real estate is local, and personal and all the reports in the world are not worth the hole in a chicken's keyster compared to what is seen out the window of the coffee shop. Let's all wait 'til the full report comes out at 10 and then we can open our check books. Read on:

NEW YORK – A trade group report today on sales of existing homes is expected to show selling increased slightly in January. The increase would mark the second straight month of improvement from November's record low.

Sales are expected to rise to a seasonally adjusted annual rate of 4.79 million units, from 4.74 million a month earlier, according to economists surveyed by Thomson Reuters. The National Association of Realtors' report is due at 10 a.m. EST.

And now for the Happy Numbers out of Washington

Just hide you cash under the bed and call it an honest mistake when they bag you for taxes...you'll be fine; just ask all the Obama-bend-over-boys (and babes)how they do it....

WASHINGTON – The unemployed population is getting older and more educated as companies ramp up layoffs and the recession deepens.

The total number of unemployed increased by more than 50 percent from January 2008 through last month, but the number of jobless Americans 55 or older jumped 70 percent, according to new Labor Department numbers released Friday.

And for people with college degrees, the number rose even more sharply, by nearly 85 percent.

The numbers confirmed a trend that job cuts are moving up the age and educational ladders, said Andrew Stettner, deputy director of the National Employment Law Project.

Layoffs are hitting middle managers and professional services firms as the recession enters its 15th month. Stettner said that's a shift from earlier in the downturn, when job cuts were concentrated in industries like construction, retail and manufacturing, where workers are generally younger and less likely to have college degrees.

Many employers are reluctant to hire older workers, Stettner said, because they may demand higher pay and companies may not want to take a chance with those who are shifting careers.

Age is more of a factor than it has been in previous recessions: Americans over 55 made up 12.8 percent of the 11.6 million unemployed last month, double the proportion in January 1982, when the country was mired in a steep recession. The aging work force explains part of the difference, but not all, Stettner said. The proportion of older Americans in the labor force has increased by 50 percent since 1982, he said.

Meanwhile, Americans over 55 constituted only 10.6 percent of the unemployed in January 2003. Unemployment peaked that year in the aftermath of the 2001 recession.

Nearly 15 percent of the unemployed have a college degree, up from 13.8 percent in January 2003 and 9.7 percent in January 1993 — another year when unemployment peaked after a recession that ended two years earlier.

The information on age and college education is just a sample of the wealth of information, beyond the headline unemployment rate, that shows up in the Labor Department's monthly employment report. Here are some more details about who is included in the ranks of the jobless, by the numbers.

___

COMPARING JANUARY WITH PAST DOWNTURNS

11.6 million: People unemployed in January 2009.

11.9 million: People unemployed in November 1982, the final month of the last recession of more than a year.

10.8 percent and 111.1 million: Unemployment rate and total work force in November 1982.

7.6 percent and 153.7 million: Unemployment rate and total work force in January 2009.

September 1992: Last time the unemployment rate was this high.

60.5 percent: Portion of the total population that had jobs in January.

May 1986: Last time the portion was this low.

___

JANUARY UNEMPLOYMENT RATE BY GROUP

7.6 percent: Adult men

6.2 percent: Adult women

10.3 percent: Female heads of households

6.2 percent: Asians

6.9 percent: Whites

9.7 percent: Hispanics

12.6 percent: Blacks

20.8 percent: Teenagers

___

LAID-OFF WORKERS

6.98 million: Unemployed in January 2009 who were laid off or completed temp jobs.

3.79 million: The same figure in January 2008.

___

JOBS HARDER TO FIND

22.4 percent: Share of unemployed in January who've been looking for 27 weeks or longer

18.1 percent: The same figure in January 2008, one month into the recession.

22.8 percent: The share in June 2003, when the unemployment rate peaked after the last recession.

___

SNAPSHOTS OF JANUARY'S UNEMPLOYED

2.75 million: People who were trying re-enter the work force after leaving work for reasons such as parenthood or retirement.

2.1 million: People who wanted to work, were available for work and had looked for work in the last 12 months, but had not looked in the last month.

7.8 million: People working part-time because of slow work or business conditions.

___

WHO'S SURVEYED

60,000: Number of households interviewed in the monthly Census Bureau survey from which the unemployment rate is extrapolated.

40 percent: Portion of companies in the survey of businesses, from which payroll and job loss numbers are extrapolated, with fewer than 20 employees.

___

LOCAL HIGHS AND LOWS

22.6 percent: Unemployment rate for El Centro, Calif., in December — the most recent month for which a local figure is available.

2.7 percent: December rate for Morgantown, W.Va.

Come Blow Your Horn in Belmont

In this the time, so we are being told, of darkness, it is a surprise to hear (since it is to be dark and we cannot see), the sign of the future. In my corner of the world, Belmont, it appears nearly 1,000 youngsters are involved in Music Programs run by the School Department's Music instructors. These programs are held during school, after school or on Saturday morns. The town is filled with little violinists, flutists and other sundry tweakers and tooters.

My own small one, after 1 year on the violin, opted for the oboe this year. In a nonce, she is up and running. So it comes a surprise that she is dropping said oboe in favor of another instrument -- the trombone. She will shift, no doubt under the careful eyes of her instructors (on Tuesdays in school and on Saturday mornings in the Town 4th Grade orchestra).

As for me...another instrument next to the lunch box in the morning -- and another one to put up on ebay

Someone Has a lot of Time on Their Hands

A bit more time for the New Years Resolution the bemade -- a one more shot of champagne before this artificial barrier is crossed -- read on...

LONDON, England (CNN) -- Always short of time? Not enough moments in the day? Tonight you'll get an extra second to enjoy 2008. Use it wisely; perhaps an extra long smooch is called for.


An extra second will be added to 2008 to align clocks with variations in the Earth's time.

Immediately before midnight a leap second -- the first for three years -- will be added to atomic clocks around the world by official timekeepers.

Peter Whibberley, a senior research scientist at Britain's National Physical Laboratory, said the Earth's erratic rotation meant an extra second needed to be added.

"The difference between atomic time and Earth time has now built up to the point where it needs to be corrected, so this New Year's Eve we will experience a rare 61 second minute at the very end of 2008 and revelers... will have an extra second to celebrate."

Traditionally time has been based on the passage of the Sun across the sky -- a modern version of this is still used by astronomers to track distant stars and spacecraft.

However, since 1967, an atomic timescale -- the extremely accurate Coordinated Universal Time (UTC) -- has been the world's official clock and is used for broadcasting time signals across the world.

The accuracy of UTC is essential for the smooth running of GPS and the Internet.

By comparison, the Earth is far less reliable. It does not rotate at a constant speed -- it can even wobble -- and disruptions to its core, extreme weather, volcanic eruptions and earthquakes can influence the length of a day.

Therefore, leap seconds are occasionally added to align atomic time with astronomical time and ensure that the Sun remains overhead at noon.

Whibberley told British media anyone sober enough and who had a digital clock that picked up leap second information from a reliable source, would see the final seconds of 2008 as 57, 58, 59, 60, 00 -- with 60

George Bail-OUT

So we all gush and weep over the plight of George Bailey of the Bailey Building and Loan. And are we so uplifted when the town folk pour their money at him to well, shall we say it, BAIL him out of a jam?

You see, folks, Mr. GB mismanaged the bank; threw the money at those ill prepared to repay it (Violet get a little slip of cash into her purse). The old man grouses that all you have to do is "Shoot Pool" with the Bailey boys and you get a loan. And then, of course, Bailey kin folk loses the money! Leaves it all on a counter. Gone Gone Gone.

What we have here is not a sentimental story, but one of malfeasance and shame; one of poor management and judgement and one of honest folks having to "pony up" to pay for it. We have a bailout.

Now how is that for Xmas cheer?

Santa Claus is Right Here in Town

My little cell phone camera does not due justice to what these folks have done. It is beautiful. Santa is here...even I am sure of it. No doubt I could look to the public record and see who owns the home on the corner of Ivaloo and Albemarle in Waltham, but why do it? Just believe for once in your life that it is not the normal work-a-day. It is a miracle. Happy season to all.