First Time Buyer in the Swiss Alps

I am with this young pup of an agent, and he just wants to tag along and tag along. He is taking notes; notes of everything that I do. I spy, on one of his little sheets, a marker in the midst of some scribe he has jotted. I ask, "What does that mark mean."

"Oh, that," he says, "it tells me when you took a breath..."

OK, I think, he is a cross between a psychopath and a boy scout, but then again, so long as he's making those marks, I am breathing so...

I try to break away, but he keeps coming. I am forced into my first white lie of the afternoon:

"I have to bug off now. I am taking a class."

"Wow. Cool," he says, "A class in what?"

I am a tad speechless by his insinuation into my person life, yet in an effort cut cut him off with good humor, I posture this little joke:

"Yodeling," I say. "I am taking a class in Yodeling", and I walk off...BUT

He is not done...It seems he did not get the joke, for he continues: "Cool, like where do you do that?"

And I am forced to posture, "Well, why...at the...ummm...at the Boston Center for Adult Education...of course."

"Wow, really neat, I did not know this stuff happened..."

Now I am forced to go on the offensive until he gets the joke:

"Well you see, Yodeling is not to be taken lightly. it is just not squawking! There is the syllabic part and the inflective part, and if either is not done correctly, you can start an avalanche! For example, take the syllabic 'Yodel-aye-ee oh!' -- very terse and sharp. Your have to smooth into it, but most people cannot do it...and bang! hitting it too hard and you've got a mountain slide! Let me demonstrate a smooth entrance to the oft quoted 'yodel-aye-ee-oh'....'YODELEETEE-YODELAYETEE-Yodel-aye-ee-ooohh.' Smooth, eh?"

He IS impressed and still believes it all, but his text messaging kicks in and he finds his pimpled teenage bride flacking out the OMG's and CU LTR's and ILYSM's and so ons and so forths. He is gone, and I am free.

This believe everything sucker is gonna go far in this world; that is for sure. He has to...all the way to Europe. Before he left, I sold him the entire north side of the Matterhorn for a song!

Happy New Year?

Low and behold; in my corner of the world agents are celebrating "Realtor New Year" on November 19. To the outside world, this might seem a bit strange -- a bunch of agents cavorting around the neighborhood, happy smiling celebrating taking tme off -- wait a tad, they are like that all year! So what be the reason for this date, and I may add, the flurry of activity going about as they get ready for the horns and hoopla on the 19th?

Agents in these last few days before the BIG 19 have been out in force trying to get a "deal" in. "Ya wanna buy a house?" Hey buddy...yeah you...c'mere...looks like you needs a house for a good time...You get the pitcure. Why why why?

Ahh, dear reader, the answer lies in the calendar... Let us look. 31 days in December plus those days from the 19th through the 30th of November, that makes, let's see 1, 2 3...12. Add that to the 31 and you get 45 days.

AND 45 days the benchmark used by agents. From the time an offer is written until the "papers" have passed is a standard (so we try) span of 45 days. Get some shnook to sign on the dotted line on November 18, and you get your agent check on December 31. Ink the contract on NOVEMBER 19 and BANG! 45 days later your agent commission check is there -- IN JANUARY! Happy New Year.

I should wonder about this, and how buyers and sellers are served by this and the countdown to moneymoneymoney, but, as an agent told me, "So long as the clients don't know, so what?"

OOOPS I just told you! And now you know something new about your agent. I just hope your New Year's Resolutions include learning something new.